Intimate wear from the dustbin

By Etchi  Besem

Welcome to Health Patch, exclusively on Green Savannah Diplomatic Cable. This is Mama Besem, Diamond Distributor with JM International. Today our slogan is “It is not the devil, it is the dustbin.”

You hardly walk out of a Nigerian church today without hearing prayers for the fruit of the womb.. Grandchildren are hard to come by and barren marriages are on the rise. I tell you, the devil who is always accused will win this case for false accusation because our girls and women are still buying and wearing sanitary pads from the dustbin. Shopping for price instead of for quality has made the dustbin a rich source of feminine intimate sanitary napkins.

Some statistics. WHO recognizes that 83% of women have gynecological diseases in their lifetime and 62% of these, are caused by the poor quality of sanitary napkins made available for women’s use. This is such a huge market because women will always menstruate. If you care, create war and famine she will still menstruate. Each woman uses at least 15000 pieces of sanitary napkin in her lifetime from puberty to menopause, then she switches to panty liners. Frankly, one girl on a sanitary napkin brand at the age of 10  is a stable customer for at least 30 years. No wonder most companies rush to the dustbin for raw materials for this market.  Dustbin is cheap, so the product price will be low; recycled paper does not absorb well, so she will buy several packets at a time; and many people believe being cheap saves money, so they will fall for this deadly trap for years on end.

Health Patch says look around you what paper is used for, where it is dumped, the truck that comes and carries the waste and imagine the amount of bacteria and self-degradation you associate yourself with. If you are not the one infected you will still get affected. How will your recycled sanitary pad not give you itches, bacterial infection, with its backflow that also causes painful menses, fibroids, myomas and blocked tubes? Tear your pad open and put some of it in water and see that it disintegrates! Does cotton disintegrate in water? If so your undies and T-shirts will scatter each time they are soaked. Health Patch says don’t be fooled about the white colour from the bleach they used to make the Dustin paper mash white. Chlorine bleach creates dioxin in your pad that causes ovarian cancer. Even if it is majority silica gel, the chemical substance on contact with your warm blood will still bring wahala. You think because your pad does not leak unto your clothes it is safe? The plastic put under is not only a petroleum product, it blocks air from reaching the cells of your intimate parts. Just think of meat in a plastic bag for one hour and you will know it is not the devil causing black menses and rotting odor from a now bacteria factory, it is the dustbin; and your buying habits of course.

Health Patch recommends 100% cotton sanitary napkins that are breathable, superabsorbent, anti-bacterial and comfortable for women’s hygiene. It is much cheaper compared to the cost of dustbin pads + emotional distress from gynecological infection + intrusive lab tests and antibiotics. JM International offers you the Angels Secret sanitary napkins brand, the best in the industry.

Dear parents and friends, anointing oil and all-night vigil prayers cannot change the sanitary napkins you buy for your daughters and what your wife uses, so give your pastors a break. Now you know, so act on it and reinstate your value. Send the trash pads back to the dustbin. Don’t forget to give your new baby my name as you enjoy health freedom from gynecological diseases and barrenness. If you take advantage of this lucrative business, biko send me only 10% gratuity. It is not the devil, it is the dustbin. Tune in next week. Ayo ni o.

Etchi Besem Oben is a PhD Theology student at Duquesne University, Pittsburgh, PA, USA and a citizen of Cameroon.